By I used to take rejection painfully personal.
If someone didn’t react well to meeting me or didn’t choose me, I assumed it was about me.
My flaws. My failures. My worth.
Then I learned about transference.
It’s a psychological concept that explains how people sometimes react to you based on who you remind them of, not who you actually are.
Maybe you triggered a memory, a wound or a disappointment. And suddenly, you’re treated like someone you’ve never met.
That realization was freeing.
It helped me stop asking, “What’s wrong with me?” and start asking, “Is this really about me?”
It doesn’t excuse hurtful behavior. But it does help us heal. It helps us stop carrying the weight of someone else’s story as if it’s our own.
So next time rejection hits, remember this: you aren’t who they think you are. You are chosen. You are loved. You are accepted.
I talk more about all this in my Rejecting Rejection ecourse, but for now, let this truth settle in. Let it shape how you see yourself. And let it remind you that someone else’s reaction doesn’t define your identity.
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Enroll in my ecourse, Rejecting Rejection. Through 8 powerful lessons, discover the life-transforming truths and strategies you need to heal the hurt and stop the fear of rejection.